Baby, We Can Dance In The Dark

Because when he's looking she falls apart!
Baby we can dance we can dance in the dark.
<3
Lady Gaga.

I love you .

Well, what can I say about today..
It was...
an emotional mess.
Here are some notes:

6:41- 
Of all people in this world, I never thought I would hate my own mother as much as I do. Believe me when I say the emotion scar she's leaving behind is killing me. I'm cutting myself, taking pills, and drinking my life away. 
I can't stand her. 
This lash out is the last one. 
No freaking more. I'm not taking this at all. Screw my plans. She can keep Adrian and Joshua, I'm no longer her kid. I'm going to make her disown me. I will no longer have a mom. I will no longer cry so hard I can barley see. I hate her with every fiber of my being. I'm "a mistake. A horrible immature bitch who need to grow up" supposably my dad is ruining my life. But no. Lashing out is MY CHOICE. NOBODY TELLS ME WHAT TO DO. especially not some corner chick like my bitxh of a mother. Kill me already </3 

6:17:
CAN YOU SAY DISGUSTING????????????????????
EW. LIKE. HELLO. CAN YOU NOT MAKE OUT WITH EACH OTHER IN FRONT OF ME. And you tell me to respect you, when you don't have the decency to control your damn WHOREmones. 
Fml -.- 

6:28-
And again with there retarded make-out selves. Go ahead. Fcovoakcik hsb jsbxbpek -.- unacceptable. This dumb shit is telling me we're hers on the 31st. NO. You already told my dad that we were his. HIS. HIS. HIS. FCK YOU. 
On my way to their new house blasting "Don't fall asleep at the helm" Thinking of suicide again. I can't help it. It's just.. When I have time to think and I'm not busy, I think of the combination on my dads safety box, because that's where all the pills are. I don't want to die. I want to cause awareness. That my mother, is unsafe. I got lies to tell your children when my smile pierces through your bones. It hurts you. Inside your bones. She's crazy. Nd she'll send me away if I say the wrong things. Which, I will. I'll let her. Cuz' im done. Uneasy hearts weigh the most. Whatever. Shes a horrible mother. Immature and irresponsible.

SHUT UP ALREADY AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR KID -.- 
God I hate her. 
She's telling me she's going to send me to boot camp cuz I'm an ungrateful little bitxh. I hate her so much. 

Oh, hair salon people are working with her. Nice. traitors. 

4:36. 
I didn't know I could cry so much in Less then 4 hours. She's treating Joshua and Adrian like her prized possessions and me? Well, I'm the piece of gum on the bottom of her shoes. She's stepping all over me. And her boyfriend aint much better. She says that she doesn't want me. She's perfectly fine with her "family" (Adrian, Joshua, her perv of a bf, and her). I freaking hate her. She's such a sarcastic little bitch. She's... Ugh. I can't explain the hatred I have towards her. I have no idea where I am. But, this place looks big enough to get lost in. Good. I turned my phone off. And SHE'S SICKENING. her and her little (still pervy) boyfriend. Being with her is like committing suicide on your birthday. Sad. And pathetic. I wish I knew where I was. I'm done. Bye. 

I'm going to make you
hate me cuz you aint me.